Choosing Joy by Faith

For this week, I chose the spiritual discipline of devotional reading. Specifically, exercise #1. This exercise focuses on Mark 10:46-52, the story of the healing of the blind man, Bartimaeus. As I read the verses aloud, several words and verses jumped out to me. Specifically, "Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you." and "Your faith has healed you."

In the second part, you were to imagine yourself in the story. As I imagined myself at the scene of this great event, I experienced overwhelming amazement at the miracle presented before me. I was struck by the power of faith to heal Bartimaues. I imagined the crowd around me at the scene, chattering wildly trying to make sense of the miracle they had witnessed. And in that moment, I could feel a contagious spirit of a new found belief ignited in my heart and the hearts of those surrounding me. I imagined experiencing a deep sense of desire and calling to actively choose faith amidst undesirable circumstances, just like Bartimaeus.

For the third section, the exercise had the reader respond to the reading in an uncensored prayer of thoughts and requests, holding nothing back. I decided to write out my thoughts and prayers. My response was as follows:

Lord, I desire for faith like Bartimaues. I want to have the same expectant hope that prompts me to lay everything before you, fully expectant that by faith you will respond to my call and great need for you. I give you my past, present, and future and choose to have faith, even when circumstances cause me to doubt. Out of undesireable circumstances, you are capable of bringing healing, hope, and new ways of seeing. Open my eyes like Bartimaues, to see every person and situation through your lens.
Your disciples called out to Bartimaeus, "Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you." You are asking the same of me. You are asking me to put aside my anxieties, doubts, pain, confusion, and act out of faith. I will get off the ground, allow you to help me on my feet, and respond to your calling to renewed perspective. And as I choose to take action, I will expectantly wait to see you at work in small and big ways in the world around me.Just like Bartimaeus, Lord, I cry, "Rabbi, I want to see."
You are saying to me,"Audrey, it is all about choice." I can choose a lens of bitterness and resentment or I can choose to greet each day with hope in the potential each new day brings. I can choose to find joy in the simple things--the smile of a stranger, the smell of spring pending in the air, or the boisterous giggle of a friend. For it is all apart of your creation, uniquely designed to cater to the hearts of your children. You are calling me to have faith that when I seek you, I will find you. In the small decisions and the big decisions--you are there. Whether I choose this job or that job...you will be in each one, if I only have the faith to seek you. By faith, I must believe that you have purpose for my life. You can take each twist and turn of life and make it something beautiful. And as I choose to have faith and see things through your eyes, I am healed.
I will choose to follow you down the rest of this curvy road of life, grasping your hand for assurance that you will never loosen your grip on me--all the days of my life.Use me for your glory Lord, and lead me where you need me. I am ready to follow by faith.
Thanks for meeting me in this moment of scripture, Lord. It is so good to meet with you once again:)

The final section asked the reader to take God's word from the scripture with them the rest of the day. I was so surprised as I went throughout the day. Several times, I was tempted to get discouraged by negative thoughts. But in those moments, I remembered the words, "Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you." And in those moments, I immediately took hold of those negative thoughts, laid them before God, and chose joy instead. What a difference this has made in my day!


This week's experience has been so refreshing. I am overwhelmed with emotion, as I once again feel God's presence. I am coming to see that periods of life that feel like a dry, spiritual desert make the moments where we experience God's presence that much more vibrant and real. I am sure I will experience a spiritual desert again in my life, but I must cling to the faith that God will lead me through it once again. I believe the development of spiritual maturity sometimes requires us to dredge through the sand of the dessert, to get back to solid spiritual ground.The deserts are not easy or fun, but they are necessary and beneficial. I am coming away from this desert, made new. I am not who I was, but I am not yet who I will be. There is so much growing yet to be done.

Everything Rests on Hope Now

Lord,

Some days the words for prayer just won't come. Thanks for knowing my heart, even when I don't know how to put it into words. I will praise you in this storm, Lord. This pit seems like a black hole, with no light in sight. But I will cling to your promises, that I can be made new. I have to believe that I WILL be made new. Lord, make me into a new creation, help me to find joy in this time. I have tasted the joy of knowing you, and I pray that I will be able to bring you glory again in my life. Right now, I am filled with shame at this person I have become. What happened to my joy, Lord? Why can't I just choose to pick myself out of this? Today...I choose to hope. Even though today I feel I will not accomplish much...I will hope that you will motivate me to take one more step. One more step towards the goal. One more step towards you.

Revelations of God Through an Ordinary Day

Sometimes it seems when we are searching so hard to find God, we miss him. This week, it was through ordinary daily activities (readings for class and bible study) that God brought up a similar concept that has been convicting me, in these two arenas. It feels almost as if God had to really highlight these areas in my life to capture my attention.

In bible study, our group is working through the book of Romans. This week in chapter 2, we talked about the legalism of the pharisees and the underlying assumption of legalistic thinking that by "doing" we can achieve salvation, or favor from God. However, the scripture degrades this thinking pointing out that it is not simple the doing of works, but a, "matter of the heart, by the Spirit, and not by the letter." It is our mindset and motivation of love, that make our works and God-honoring acts of worship.

I would say that over the years, I at times lean so far on the side of legalism, that I strive for an unobtainable perfection. The things I do are motivated by the fear of "straying from the law" rather than motivated out of love.

It's funny to see how this is starting to align with theoretical models of social work practice that I have been studying. Cognitive theoretical perspective suggests that our actions are determined and dictated by our core beliefs and assumptions. In therapy, we aim to journey with our clients into the identification of these core beliefs and assumptions that can play into our emotions and actions. We work to identify and reconstruct maladaptive beliefs, which in turn impacts a shift emotional regulation. Through Romans, I am seeing Pauls version of cognitive therapy. He is helping the pharisees identify these maladaptive thought patterns, that are motivating and driving their actions. And in the end, it is the core motivator and belief of love that resolves their thinking paradigm into something constructive and God-honoring.

In my Christan Social Work and Theology class, we have an assignment weekly to engage in different forms of spiritual disciplines. We had a discussion about the challenge of mandating spiritual practices. What is our motivation? Is it just for class or is it motivated by a genuine desire to create a space to meet God? I can honestly say, that I am excited to see where God leads through these spiritual disciplines. I long to connect with him and learn more about his character through this time. And I think through learning more about God's character, my motivations will hopefully become saturated with a focus and love and less on "achieving" love and acceptance from God. And if my thought paradigm shifts away from striving to achieve God's love, this conviction will outpour in my daily life and actions. I hope that I will demonstrate a peace and acceptance that reflects the the Grace God provides for me unconditionally--no strings attached.

I don't know if my random pondering makes sense, but I think the bottom line is that God is at work in me. He continues to pursue me by demonstrating my never-ending need to repent and accept his grace. For me, a change from my "pharisee" ways is to be more real about my struggles. I'm realizing, sometimes I would put up a front as if I have it all together, when deep inside I am a struggling sinner just like everyone else. I want to be able to share with my brothers and sisters in Christ my own struggles, and not condemn, but journey with them through their own struggles.

This song just epitomizes my journey with God the last several months!

Jimmy Needham--Yours to Take

This is my second chance
This is no song and dance
You came in and renewed a right spirit
This is grace at its best
This is taking a restless, messed up heart and having you clear it

I can feel the weight is lifting
I'm barely staying on the ground
And I can feel the wait is over
Finally the lost is found

[Chorus]
So, this is what it feels like to live life
So, this is breathing air for the very first time
The Son of man, He came here to give life
And in return He asking for mine
I've Been captured by grace
I'm not going away
I'm Yours to take

I was down for the count
I was *all* but knocked out
When I heard pardon for the interruption
Then like out of blue
Out came glorious You

You picked me up without barely any introduction
You won my heart by a landslide
You tend to do that every time
So, everything I have is Yours now
Even my very life

So, this is what it feels like to live life
So, this is breathing air for the very first time
The Son of man, He came here to give life
And in return He asking for mine,well
I've Been captured by grace
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com
I'm not going away
I'm Yours to take

Your kindness leads me to repentance
Leads me to the cross, which leads me to forgiveness
So, I'm counting it all as loss


So, this is what it feels like to live life
So, this is breathing air for the very first time
The Son of man, He came here to give life
And in return He asking for mine

So, this is what it feels like to live life
So, this is breathing air for the very first time
The Son of man, He came here to give life
And in return He asking for mine
I've been captured by grace
I'm not going away
I'm Yours to take

So, this is what it feels like to live life (I'm Yours to take)
So, this is what it feels like to live life (I'm Yours to take)
So, this is what it feels like to live life (I'm Yours to take)
So, this is what it feels like to live life (I'm Yours to take)

Marinating in God's Faithfulness

Oh man, has it been a while! So much has happened since September. New friendships, new adventures, new internship, new semester--everything was brand-spanking new. Needless to say, my time was preoccupied with adjusting to this newness and trying to embrace each moment.

Now, a few months later, some of the newness has worn off. I am back in Rochester for my FINAL semester, and equipping myself for the final push to the end of this Grad School Chapter of my life. Specifically, over the past few weeks as I have prayed for God to give me clarity in decision making in several areas of my life, I have been overwhelmed by how he not only gave me wisdom on the situations but taught me more about my insecurities and my need for further dependence on him. Too often, I am finding that I feel this overwhelming burden of being, "too much" and "not enough" all at the same time. As I enter into relationships, I am driven in the way I relate to others out of this fear of being "too needy" or "too independent". I desire to be a balanced woman between these two extremes. Independent enough to be confident and trusting in God's timing and plan for my life, be not too independent that I am unable to take risks in vulnerability and realness with others.

I am sure a balance exists. And right now in my times with God, I will marinate in his faithfulness expectant that as I seek Him more closely each day, I will slowly unlock these shackles that bind me. I chose the word marinate, because it is just such a clear mental picture that helps me fully embrace God's faithfulness. When we marinate meat, we take something dead and lifeless, and saturate it in zest, spice, and goodness to produce something tantalizing and tender. It takes time to soak it all in, and it is a process--but the end result is well worth the wait.

I am the same way. I am dead and lifeless with the sin and bondage that are present in my life. But when I absorb the truth of God and his faithfulness, I am infused with renewed perspective. And it is a lifelong process. I have missed a few ingredients in my marination along the way the last few months, and as a result have perhaps not always glorified God in my words, motivations, and actions. But God's grace and faithfulness are my hope in this process. When I come to him with the shame of an uneatable product, he refines the recipe to create something fresh and new. (An ironic metaphor, since some of my most recent recipes have not turned out so well..just ask my family:) What a blessing to have hope in forgiveness and fresh starts!

His word tells me:

For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control

(2 Timothy 1:7).

Perhaps, God is calling me to stop trying so hard to "be balanced"...and just allow the presence of his spirit to guide me towards acceptance of his unconditional love, which ignites a natural outpouring of contentment and fulfillment in Him. As a result, this will pour over into my relationships.

I am so thankful for each person, relationship, and situation (whether challenging or exhilarating) that have helped me come to this point of refocus. While the lull before the new semester allows me more time to process the last few months, I hope to carry what I have learned into action over the next several months. This is a new semester of refinement for me!

Objective: To become the God-honoring woman God desires me to be, and give him glory in this process of refinement.

Goals For the Next Semester

1.) Focus on Creating God Honoring Friendships

2.) Encourage others rather than tear them down in my speech

3.) Expectantly embrace the future of the unknown ahead of me with eagerness:)

4.) Enjoy the journey...including both sunshine and storms along the way!

5.) Remember and accept God's unconditional love, no matter my emotional state or circumstances

6.) Be more real and vulnerable with others

7.) Create dialogue that fuels discussion about God, faith, and our daily life journeys with people God places in my life.

7.) Take more risks

8.) Try new Things

9.) Accept the things I cannot change

10.) Laugh A Lot along the way!

If anyone who knows me reads this. Please keep me accountable:)

Thanks Friends!

And even when the trees have just surrendered To the harvest time Forfeiting their leaves in late September And sending us inside Still I notice You when change begins And I am braced for colder winds I will offer thanks for what has been and was to come
-Nichole Nordeman

Lord,

I love the lyrics of Nichole Nordeman's song. Lord, as I brace for new things to come this semester, I just want to thank you for the season of life this summer has been for me. You have been at work in me. I have no doubt that you will continue to work in me. In this next season, show me how to love more deeply and with less self-centerdeness. I pray for your guidance as I try to balance the demands of school, internship, social life, church, and work. Although I may not be able to fully dedicate myself to a specific mission organization right now, I pray that wherever I go--I will be part of your mission field. I pray for intentionality in relationships with others and just that out these natural relationships--you would be evident in me and spring up conversation that brings you glory and honor.

I don't want to live the status quo. I want to live with meaning and purpose, Lord. I know that sometimes difficult things will happen. I just pray that you would be my source of strength when things are difficult.

Lord you know those on my heart that just need to experience you more. I just pray that you would make yourself present in new ways that captivate their hearts and draw them to your love.

I love you:) Thanks for listening!

Couldn't ask for anything more!

Lord,

I just want to express my utmost gratitude. You have exceeded all of my expectations of what Rochester could be. I am learning what it means to live in authentic community. I am so blessed with all the Amazing people I am meeting on this journey. I'll be honest, some days I almost feel guilty that I am enjoying life so much right now. I know I need to be a little more cautious with my money budgeting but I just don't want to miss a beat here. I want to experience it all. I don't know if I will be here past May, so I just want to see it all. My heart is just so happy, I want each day to have it's fullest potential....taking care of my responsibilities of school and internship, but also being intentional about living life with others. This means going out for coffee..runs...adventures and enjoying the little things in life. I am content. Not artificial--contentment--but deep down belly fuzzy true contentment. My focus is shifting from longing for life to be a certain way...to accepting and thriving with joy about where you have me now. I look forward to all that is in store. I pray that you would just continue to bring people in my life who encourage me to grow deeper with you and live out my faith.

This morning, I got up at the crack of dawn and went to the downtown farmers market in Rochester with my friends. It's a crisp autumn day, and the aromas of candied almonds and fresh baked bread permeated the air. The vibrant colors of fruits and vegetables splattered rows and rows of tables. I wish I had a camera to capture it! I grabbed a whoopie pie from an amish stand. It filled the little void of home that I missed on this morning since all of my family is coming together today in Lancaster and I will not be there. Then got some chai tea at a cute coffee shop to warm me up and perused the isles for the best deal on my fruits and veggies for the week. I love that the farmers markets provides vouchers for low-income families. It is often difficult for families with limited incomes to afford the cost of fresh produce that is so essential to healthy diets. This is a great option for them...and grad students with limited incomes too:).

On the way home, I had a great conversation with my friend and fellow GRAD student Leonna. We were talking about what we hope our lives to look like in the future. What it would mean to live out faith authentically. I dream of living in a low-income area with a husband who has a heart for people to0. I want to provide hospitality in my home and have that as a ministry. Not telling people...You need Jesus....but just developing relationships with neighbors. Meeting people where they are at in life. I just don't want to do it alone. I continue to pray that the Lord would bring a man into my life who has a same desire and would want to embark on that adventure with me. I place no expectations that this is what the Lord will do, but I see it as my ideal life. I pray that the Lord will lead me wherever he could use me. Wherever that may be and with whoever that means I will navigate my life with.

Well I need to get some homework done before babysitting tonight. Signing of with Chris Tomlin lyrics that I really am enjoying right now. Lord, I just pray for the week ahead. That you would provide me with the energy to get everything completed and just really give you glory through it all. Lord, I lift up the people in my life who are hurting right now. Whether that be struggles with relationships, health issues, finances, life transitions, etc. I pray that your holy spirit would fill each person's heart and guide them to peace amidst the struggle.

With love,

Aud

Here I bring my stains and crowns
Gentle river wash me now
Your love is deeper than I know
Your ways higher than I can go

Lead me in Your holiness
I will follow, I confess
Glory is the song I sing
Your life is living me

And where would I be
Without You, without You?
Where would I be
Without You?

I will bow before the cross
Cherish my Redeemer's cost
There is nothing I can do
But only stand amazed by You

Mercy new with every day
Wrapped up in Your arms of grace
Nothing more, You're all I need
Your life is living me

Like a waterfall
You fill my heart and overflow
Like a candle flame
You light my way
And lead me as I go

Spirit overflow
Let me overflow

Outflow

What a FANTASTIC Labor Day Weekend. The Lord has definitely been just rejuvenating my sound through friends and fun. Friday night, I went to the Rascal Flatts concert. It was the best concert I have ever been to and it was such a blessing to bond with Marti (I rent a room in her house). Then, Saturday I slept in and then went to the Waterloo outlets for some shopping. This had been on my Rochester to-do list, and it was a great time. In the evening, I went to a friend's home in the city for a bar-b-que. It was a fun time and a great chance to meet so many new people! Plus, I made Banana Bars on Friday for the event and they were a delicious taste of home:)

The weather here as been getting cooler! It almost feels like Fall. I must admit, while I am in no way happy to see summer go, I am eager for the cozy and crisp feeling of Fall. At 7 am this morning, I embarked on a 10 mile run with two friends as we prepare for the last leg of our training for the Rochester Half-Marathon next Sunday!!! We ran along the canal and in that 90 minutes, I just felt God's presence. He assured me that I am where I need to be right now and he asked me to keep pursuing him, even when it hurts. So then, I went to church.

Once again, I felt God taping on my shoulder. For months now, I've been praying that God would help me to be less self-focused and more others-focused. I wish I could say I no longer think about myself and solely think about others....but that would not be true. But my heart is eager to live an authentic, natural life of serving others that pours out my love for Christ. So, as I was sitting in church today, it was ironic that the pastor announced the next series would be title Outflow...and there is a study book that the congregation was encouraged to follow. As I purchased the book, I had to think...God is really listening. I want to be the hands and feet of Christ. I don't always want to choose the comfortable or easy path because it is best for me. I just pray that through the next year, I will see a difference.

I remember in high school, there was one Christian guy who was the most kind and compassionate male I have ever met. He was in the school bible study. Everytime I saw him though, I thought to myself, "I don't want him to be nice to me just because he feels bad for me...or is trying to sell faith to me, because he doesn't know I am a believer." It's sad that I thought that way, because his intentions probably were genuine. But I have to think about what other non-believers think when Christians reach out to them. I think that it is only through a genuine and intimate relationship with Christ, that we begin to overflow into others naturally. Not in a way that makes them feel like we are just doing our Christian duty, but we do it in a way that says...."You are worth it. I want to get to know you. I see great things in you." And that is why I pray that through delving into my relationship with Christ...I could find that balance and outflow naturally into the lives of others. Through social work I have found...this life is definitely not about me. It is about each person who is a child of God. In the words of a song on my IPOD, "We all need saving sometimes." It's about being vulnerable with others and living life together. Lord, please show me what it means to love people in the most genuine way possible.

Eat Pray Love

This afternoon, I splurged and went to the movies to see Eat, Pray, Love. I'll be honest, I wasn't thrilled about it and some of the messages it portrayed. However, there were some aspects that sent me thinking about my journey to Rochester. The movie is centered around a woman who wakes up one day and decides that she no longer wants to be married and so she gets divorced. She then gets into a fling with a younger man and discovers that what she really needs is balance in life. She runs away for a years journey in Italy, India, and Bali. Unfortunately, the movie portrays it as a good practice to run away and find yourself whenever life gets hard. Personally, I feel that sometimes we find ourselves most when we engage in the difficult, everyday life struggles.

Anyhow, the movie focuses on the relationships created along the woman's journey which help her achieve, "balance". I did however really like this theme. I've seen it most in my journey in Rochester. Now, I did not necessarily come to Rochester to run away for a while. I have a distinct purpose for being here to get my MSW. But I find so much truth in how God has created us each for relationship. Not only relationship with each other, but with Him. And sometimes the two relationships go hand in hand. I don't want to be on a journey that is solely about me, like in the movie. I want to be on a journey that is about other people. Every person has a story. They have unimaginable wisdom and can teach us so much. I want to look at each person, and treat them as if they have so much to teach me. I want to dig deeper with people and hear their experiences with God. I want to be passionate about those around me. But most of all, I do not want to write anybody off. I never want anyone to feel like they have to prove themselves to me. Authentic. Genuine. Real. I hope these are the kinds of relationships I can continue to foster here in Rochester and beyond.

Right now I have a bucket list that I am trying to complete. I get excited about each new adventure. But I hope each adventure is less about me, and more about truly taking in the blessings of God in each adventure. Big or Small. I want to be focused on what God is doing in every moment and I want to think about my hopes and dreams, less.

What would it look like, if we saw each person as valuable? I don't just mean, being respectful to everyone. I mean....what if we tried to truly get to know everyone. What if we didn't immediately judge or label people? I know this is all a little too utopian, but I think it is worth thinking about. Jesus was that ultimate person who loved people regardless of their flaws. Believe me, I am a very flawed person myself. How humbling would it be to encounter people in everyday who just desire to listen, think, and pray for one another.

Anyways...those are just my thought processes after seeing the movie. I think the woman in the movie did not have to fly across the world to find balance. I think she just needed to be intentional about pursuing God and letting his love outpour into relationships around her.

Tomorrow: RASCAL FLATTS!!!!!!! This has been on my life to do list for a while. I'm glad I get the chance to do it tomorrow. I want others to experience God and I pray that He would somehow use a nobody like me to make even a dent of difference. God has given me a season of singleness and I hope that through this season......I will learn how to love like Christ and to take advantage of every opportunity!

That's all for now:)

Aud

Optimistic and Hopeful

Lord,

You are so good. You know my heart had been down and out for a little while since I had returned back to Rochester. Yesterday I started my field class and I feel really excited about the professor and the opportunity to grow with my social work peers as we navigate our way through our field placements. Today,I got my photo ID taken at the school district. Although I only encountered the secretary, it was one of the first positive experiences I have had there. Thanks for that blessing. I pray that I will continue to have positive interactions with everyone I meet and work with there. I got errands done, and got a jump start on reading by the pool:) Then....I had PLAY THERAPY. I think this quite possibly could be my absolute favorite class. It is right up my alley, seems like a manageable workload, and a topic that I LOVE! My professor is great too!

Lord, I just feel optimistic about the future today. I'm letting go of fears about what comes after May. That will take care of itself once I get there. You already have an amazing plan in place. My prayer now is that you would just prepare me in the here and now for what is to come post-graduation. And I am preparing myself, that this next journey may be require me to walk it alone (not completely alone...with you, of course). And today...I feel at peace with that. I pray that you will give me passion to pursue my field work and class work with joy and excitement.

I Lord, I pray for all those struggling right now with jobs, etc. Your ways are higher, Lord. Thanks for turning a new leaf. I think I am finally ready to embrace all that is Rochester, again.

I love you!

Audrey

When Silence Reigns

Lord,

Thank you for such beautiful weather. The beat of the sun mixed with the cool breeze made it the perfect day to relax outdoors. I'll admit Lord, today felt lonely. I had so much time alone with my thoughts. Too much time to question myself, my lack of male friends, etc. Lord, please help me to have an open mind tonight. Help me to enjoy myself and take advantage of getting to know my new roommate better. Lord, I desire your peace right now with my life situation. No matter how much I try not to dwell on my life circumstances...I can't do it alone. Lord, I pray for the week ahead, that you would just be present as things hopefully progress with field placement. Lord I just pray for contentment in you, if it be your will. I pray for a life that is honoring to you in how I interact with others, use my time,finances, and talents.

In your name,

Audrey

Undone

Come undone, surrender is stronger
I don’t need to be the hero tonight
We all want love we all want honor
Nobody wants to pay the asking price

-FFH

Lord,

Thank you for being my constant in the ever-changing world around me. My heart is yours and yours alone, Lord. Thank you for being my keeper and protector. I pray that you will guard my heart from here on out. Thank you for allowing me to surrender things to you and leave them in your care. Thank you for strengthening me as I had to reface things that I had surrendered. Even though sometimes it feels like surrender does make me come undone, it frees me up to your ultimate will for me. Lord, I don't need to try and seek explanation for why things happen the way they do. I am able to trust you have it in your hands and I don't need to try and figure it out. I pray that I will continue to see things from your higher perspective. As I return back to Rochester Lord, guide me on this journey and help me to invest in things that will bring you eternal glory. It's all about your design for my life now, Lord.

Lots of love,

Audrey

Seasons

So, after five intense weeks I have finally finished summer courses for grad school. It's hard to believe that I have been in Rochester for over three months now. Time has flown by and God has just been teaching me so much in these last few months. This morning, I was thinking about seasons of life. I was thinking how nice it is that seasons of life are always changing. Perhaps for some they don't change like they would have wished, but overall seasons of life change. I just want to praise God for each of the seasons I've been through and am going through right now. Through each season God has allowed me to meet so many great people. What a blessing. I look forward to the many seasons to come and the great friends I have yet to meet along the way!

There have been some stressful moments the last few weeks with school logistics. In those moments I get so caught up in the stress, that sometimes I lose touch with what really matters. It's so funny how God always works things out in the end, and yet somehow I always get anxious when the stress comes pouring over me. I pray that I can look to the future with confidence that God has planned a better story for me than I can plan for myself. He already has!

Heavenly Father, as I come to a point of break from the demands of classes, papers, and projects, I ask that you would fill me with your peace. Allow me to take you in with every moment and experience that is presented to me. Let me not take a single moment for granted and allow me to experience your character more each day. Please just have your hand upon friends, new and old. Whatever their struggles, I lift them up to you and ask that each person would feel your comforting hand. Thanks for loving me, even when I don't deserve it. Thanks for revealing yourself to me through everyday people. And thanks for sending your Son in my place.

Much love,

Audrey

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8:

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
a time to rend, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
a time to love, and a time to hate;
A time of war and a time of peace.