Optimistic and Hopeful

Lord,

You are so good. You know my heart had been down and out for a little while since I had returned back to Rochester. Yesterday I started my field class and I feel really excited about the professor and the opportunity to grow with my social work peers as we navigate our way through our field placements. Today,I got my photo ID taken at the school district. Although I only encountered the secretary, it was one of the first positive experiences I have had there. Thanks for that blessing. I pray that I will continue to have positive interactions with everyone I meet and work with there. I got errands done, and got a jump start on reading by the pool:) Then....I had PLAY THERAPY. I think this quite possibly could be my absolute favorite class. It is right up my alley, seems like a manageable workload, and a topic that I LOVE! My professor is great too!

Lord, I just feel optimistic about the future today. I'm letting go of fears about what comes after May. That will take care of itself once I get there. You already have an amazing plan in place. My prayer now is that you would just prepare me in the here and now for what is to come post-graduation. And I am preparing myself, that this next journey may be require me to walk it alone (not completely alone...with you, of course). And today...I feel at peace with that. I pray that you will give me passion to pursue my field work and class work with joy and excitement.

I Lord, I pray for all those struggling right now with jobs, etc. Your ways are higher, Lord. Thanks for turning a new leaf. I think I am finally ready to embrace all that is Rochester, again.

I love you!

Audrey

When Silence Reigns

Lord,

Thank you for such beautiful weather. The beat of the sun mixed with the cool breeze made it the perfect day to relax outdoors. I'll admit Lord, today felt lonely. I had so much time alone with my thoughts. Too much time to question myself, my lack of male friends, etc. Lord, please help me to have an open mind tonight. Help me to enjoy myself and take advantage of getting to know my new roommate better. Lord, I desire your peace right now with my life situation. No matter how much I try not to dwell on my life circumstances...I can't do it alone. Lord, I pray for the week ahead, that you would just be present as things hopefully progress with field placement. Lord I just pray for contentment in you, if it be your will. I pray for a life that is honoring to you in how I interact with others, use my time,finances, and talents.

In your name,

Audrey

Undone

Come undone, surrender is stronger
I don’t need to be the hero tonight
We all want love we all want honor
Nobody wants to pay the asking price

-FFH

Lord,

Thank you for being my constant in the ever-changing world around me. My heart is yours and yours alone, Lord. Thank you for being my keeper and protector. I pray that you will guard my heart from here on out. Thank you for allowing me to surrender things to you and leave them in your care. Thank you for strengthening me as I had to reface things that I had surrendered. Even though sometimes it feels like surrender does make me come undone, it frees me up to your ultimate will for me. Lord, I don't need to try and seek explanation for why things happen the way they do. I am able to trust you have it in your hands and I don't need to try and figure it out. I pray that I will continue to see things from your higher perspective. As I return back to Rochester Lord, guide me on this journey and help me to invest in things that will bring you eternal glory. It's all about your design for my life now, Lord.

Lots of love,

Audrey

Seasons

So, after five intense weeks I have finally finished summer courses for grad school. It's hard to believe that I have been in Rochester for over three months now. Time has flown by and God has just been teaching me so much in these last few months. This morning, I was thinking about seasons of life. I was thinking how nice it is that seasons of life are always changing. Perhaps for some they don't change like they would have wished, but overall seasons of life change. I just want to praise God for each of the seasons I've been through and am going through right now. Through each season God has allowed me to meet so many great people. What a blessing. I look forward to the many seasons to come and the great friends I have yet to meet along the way!

There have been some stressful moments the last few weeks with school logistics. In those moments I get so caught up in the stress, that sometimes I lose touch with what really matters. It's so funny how God always works things out in the end, and yet somehow I always get anxious when the stress comes pouring over me. I pray that I can look to the future with confidence that God has planned a better story for me than I can plan for myself. He already has!

Heavenly Father, as I come to a point of break from the demands of classes, papers, and projects, I ask that you would fill me with your peace. Allow me to take you in with every moment and experience that is presented to me. Let me not take a single moment for granted and allow me to experience your character more each day. Please just have your hand upon friends, new and old. Whatever their struggles, I lift them up to you and ask that each person would feel your comforting hand. Thanks for loving me, even when I don't deserve it. Thanks for revealing yourself to me through everyday people. And thanks for sending your Son in my place.

Much love,

Audrey

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8:

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
a time to rend, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
a time to love, and a time to hate;
A time of war and a time of peace.

Letting Go

Sometimes in life, we hold onto things. They could be hopes, dreams, relationships, etc. But sometimes when we place so much weight in these things we hold onto, they take our focus off God.This last week has been all over the place. It was stressful and hectic, and then fun and chill. But the difference between these different feelings was one thing; I decided to let go. There have been some things in my heart that I had been hoping for, praying for, and pretty much telling God I needed to happen. I can't even really explain what it was, but I reached a point where I genuinely and authentically let these things go to God. For me, letting go is not just letting go in my mind. It is taking physical action to do things that will sever whatever is binding me to anything that separates me from God. It's weird. I feel so much more vulnerable without these dreams that I have let go. And now, God is free to do whatever he needs from me. In an interview this week, I was asked if I would stay in Rochester if a job opened up. It's still too early in the game for any big decisions, but my heart is opening up to wherever God leads. It's liberating and exciting but frightening all at the same time. I think if nothing else, God has brought me to Rochester to grow in ways that I could not have grown in the comfort of my home town. I know God knows me better than I know me, and He will continue to lead me to places where I can grow closer to Him. What a faithful God!

Overwhelmed

Well, it's been quite some time since my last post. Life has been so busy and I feel like a bee flying from one place to the next. There has definitely been some fun along the way. It was so great to get to celebrate a childhood friend's wedding this last weekend and see many old friends again. I also had the chance to meet my nephew for the first time since he was born. Let's just say it was love at first sight:) This week was supposed to be plagued with papers and projects. Thankfully, they were mostly moved until next week. It's a blessing to have more time, but I just am feeling overwhelmed by how much is due.

Today, I decided to dedicate most of my day to school work before class, with the exception of a morning run. I felt confident I would get a whole lot done. However, I ended up spending more time on one project that took the entire day. So, my to do list is still long. I just pray that the Lord would guide me with diligence and time management to get it all done. Sometimes, my perfectionist ways prevent me from just getting things done. I'm struggling for balance right now. I want to be a good student and do well, but I also don't want to fall back into old habits of neglecting social and personal time. hm....so much to ponder, but I need to get ready for class.

Lord, I just pray that in all I say and do, you would be glorified. Give me the motivation and time management to do well in all areas of life. Lord, you know my concerns with finding a field placement. I lift them up to you! Please just have your hand on all those who are in pain right now whether emotionally or physically. Place your healing hand upon them, so that they may know your love. Thanks for being my rock, Lord. I'm going to need to rest on your steadfastness for the remainder of my time in graduate school. Praising you for the wonderful news regarding a friend, who has a potential health crisis. Praying that the results continue to be positive.

Amen!